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Divorce
Divorce is a traumatic experience
for all involved. It is a private and personal affair, and at the same
time an event that has significant public and legal ramifications. When
a Jewish couple marries, they participate in both a religious and a
civil ceremony, marking both a change in their legal status and a
recognition of the spiritual dimension of the bond between husband and
wife. When the marriage bond is broken, it is important that both of
these aspects of marriage are taken into consideration.
Together with many the arrangements
you will be making at the time of your divorce, it is important that you
make sure that you have taken all the necessary steps to terminate your
marriage under Jewish law. This will help avoid complications for
yourself - if you wish to remarry in the future - and for any children
you may have in the future. Just as a beautiful huppah (wedding
ceremony) adds an important spiritual dimension to marriage, people
going through divorce find that the ritual of Jewish divorce gives a
proper sense of closure to their marriage, and allows them to move on
with their lives.
You should either already have a
Civil Divorce, or be nearing the end of the Civil Divorce proceedings
before a Jewish Divorce takes place. However, you may approach us at any
time to discuss the requirements of Jewish Divorce to make sure that
everything is done properly and will proceed smoothly.
Who should consider a Masorti
divorce?
The politics of the Jewish world have greater consequences in the realm
of Divorce than in any other area of Jewish law. We advise those who
intend to marry under Orthodox auspices, or in the future may have
children who will marry under Orthodox auspices, to seek an Orthodox
divorce. Our proceedings are appropriate for those who have previously
used our services, for a marriage or conversion, or who intend to
remarry in a Masorti synagogue.
What should I expect?
The basic ritual of Jewish divorce involves a man giving his wife
the formal document of divorce known as a ‘get’. The get is written in a
precise manner by a specially trained scribe. The essence of the get is
the statement that the wife is ‘free to marry any man she chooses’.
To be valid the ‘get’ needs to be
perfect in everyway, without mistakes or corrections. There is also a
precise ritual for the delivery of a ‘get’. For this reason, the get is
written by a specially trained scribe, and the delivery of a ‘get’ needs
to take place in the presence of a specially trained Bet Din.
At presence, we use a scribe in
Canada to write our ‘gittin’. The writing of a ‘get’ takes several
weeks, and requires 2 meetings with the Bet Din.
In the first meeting the husband
meets with the Bet Din or its representatives to discuss the divorce. At
this time he will be asked to sign documents appointing our scribe as
his agent to write the ‘get’ on his behalf. The Bet Din will also speak
with the wife to make sure that she is aware that Jewish divorce
proceedings have commenced and that she gives her consent. Consent of
both parties is an absolute requirement of Jewish Divorce law. The
couple will need to provide the Bet Din with details of their Hebrew and
English names, of their original wedding, and of their civil divorce.
These details are then sent to our scribe, and the ‘get’ is prepared and
written.
In the second meeting the couple
come together to the Bet Din for the delivery of the ‘get’. Both parties
are asked to confirm that they are participating in the ceremony of
their own free will. The husband delivers the ‘get’ to his wife in a
special ritual. After the ceremony the ‘get’ is returned to the Bet Din
for safekeeping and a certificate of divorce is issued to the couple.
There are some variations to this
procedure in special circumstances. If the husband consents to the
divorce, but is unwilling or unable to come to the Bet Din, he may
appoint an agent to deliver the ‘get’ on his behalf. This procedure is
also used if the divorce has been particularly acrimonious, and the
couple do not wish to meet each other at the Bet Din. You will discuss
this with the director of the Bet Din or your local Rabbi when we first
discuss the divorce with you.
In other cases, where you have
special concerns or there are complications, you are advised to discuss
your circumstances with us. We will do whatever is possible within the
boundaries of Jewish law to help make the delivery of a ‘get’ possible.
We understand that a divorce is a
particularly difficult time in your life. We aim to support you wherever
possible. You are welcome to bring a friend or relative with you to the
Bet Din if this will make you feel more at ease.
Costs
The cost of preparing and delivering a ‘get’ is £380.00. The couple
will need to decide between them how they share this cost. The bulk of
this cost is for the scribe to prepare the ‘get’.
First steps
If you are interested in learning more about Divorce under the auspices
of the European Masorti Bet Din, you should in the first instance speak
to your local Masorti Rabbi or contact the Bet Din directly. For contact
details, click here. |
